Pick Your Big Dream + Defend It - When I Grow Up

Pick Your Big Dream + Defend It - When I Grow Up If Your Dreams Dont Scare You Theyre Not Big Enough by Whimsy Collage This is a quest post from the one and only Jacqui Bryant of Stairwell Spirit. Shes a former client o mine and a current author and writing teacher. Here she shows us not only about picking a Big Dream, but defending it, too! This seems like a no brainerchase your big dream. Youll succeed or fail, all the while life will continue. Unless, like me, youre scared of failure. Not because it would be embarrassing but because if you were to fail at your big dream, could you stand to live in the world after? Its like eating all the best parts of food first and realizing that you have to choke down the rest and it ends up being a horrible taste stuck in your mouth. Im the type of person who saves the best for last and even though I didnt mean to I applied this logic to my big dream. I worked on smaller, back-up dreams that were big dream adjacent, in case my big dream fell through, even though I hadnt started to work on my big dream. Now every time I would suffer a set back in a back-up plan I would take a step closer to my big dream, but I was still afraid to dive in because the results were unforeseeable and Id just failed something big dream adjacent proof that I would probably fail in my big dream. Then got l aid off from my underemployed job. Nothing like being told in 24 hours you wont have a job and realizing about a week later that you also werent getting paid for the past 3 weeks work to boot to bring on sudden clarity. I realized that it really couldnt get much worse for me, career wise at least, and that my safe back-up plan was anything but. The kicker is that I was angry at myself for not realizing this sooner: back-up plans not only will still be there if you fail, they are there for when you fail and not before youve started. Plus your back-up plan will probably seem far more awesome post-failure instead of pre. Once youve picked your big dream, life still wont be easy. Your mind will play all the discouraging comments it can think up on a loop and since youre so creative, youre mind has plenty of material. If youre brave, you may have even shared your big dream with a loved one and they said less than encouraging things. This feeds your negative mindset because the speaker is a supportive person. I cant believe youd want to be a master zookeeper, arent all zoos struggling to stay afloat right now? or Gardening is for old ladies who prune flowers. Theres no money or real education required. Its not you, its them. They are far too supportive for your own good. These people dont have your skill or drive and they probably dont know what theyre talking about. Theyre speaking out of love, but also out of turn. If confrontation isnt your thing, write the person and/or yourself a letter detailing all the things that they said or you thought that are holding you back. I suggest not sending the letter to the person, but if you need to release it, mail it to a dead address or to Frank Warren or burn it. Allow yourself to make peace with the well meaning naysayer. I do highly suggest sticking up for yourself and your dream in the moment. Even a small comment like, Hey small rain cloud, this is my parade can help you feel less like youre dream is ludicrous and more empowered with downing the other person. This is your big dream, its a balloon that will lift you up if you protect it, and drag you down if you dont. Jacqui Bryant’s love for reading, ability to create adventure, and general curiosity for all things unconventional in life may outweigh her ability to write well. But she doesnt think so. Jacqui holds a BA in a couple of different things from Emerson College and posts a new writing or reading prompt, exercise, or trick every Friday at her website Stairwell Spirit.